The Pevency Childrens Plot for Taking Over Narnia
by The one the only PROBIE
Summary: What if the Pevency children didn't want to help Narnia but to turn into a theme park. A Bit of a random story that is destine to have a random ending. R
1. Chapter 1

Planes flew over London spontaneously dropping bombs on people houses.

"Oh, Heinrich," cut in Heinrich's co-pilot Johan, obviously speaking in German. "Be careful were your dropping those things, we don't want to blow up our favourite kebab shop."

There was an explosion.

"Whoops too late." Chuckled Drew nervously. "Never really had good aim, you know."

Johan sighed angrily.

"Oh look were out of ammunition." Exclaimed Heinrich pointing at the "empty ammunition" button.

"Oh no, we're not." Replied Johan reaching for the eject button.

"Wait what are you doing?" Asked Heinrich worriedly.

"This is for the kebab shop."

"Edmund stop looking out the window, despite what the radio said it is not going to be raining men." Ordered Edmund's mother anxiously trying to pull him from the window, England was being bombed by the Germans.

"Oh look there's a man falling from the sky."

"Is he good looking?" Asked Susan running to the window.

"Susan!"

"Not any more."

"Would you two get away from the window and get into the bomb shelter already." Screamed their mother looking like she was about to explode.

"Oh alright." They sighed.

So Susan, Edmund, peter and their mother ran to the bomb shelter. When they got inside their mother counted them.

"Oh no where's Lucy?"

"I'll get her." Offered Edmund running back outside to the house again.

"No Edmund wait, don't worry about her she's young we've barely even gotten attach to her!" Screamed his mother.

"I'll stop him!" Yelled Peter running after Edmund.

Edmund ran into Lucy's room. "Lucy!"

"I'm scared." Whimpered Lucy coming out from behind the door.

"Get over it." Edmund grabbed Lucy's hand and was about to run back out to the shelter with her when Peter appeared.

"Damn you found her."

"What?"

"Never mind, mum says that if we come back in one piece she'll tell us something important."

So Peter, Edmund and Lucy all ran back to the shelter to find out what that something was dodging a second German that had been ejected out of his plan.

"I can't believe mum sent us away to this old coot's home." Muttered Peter miserably picking fluff off the professor's couch.

"You know she did what she had to do Peter." replied Susan comfortingly.

"The old mans strange, I'm sure he was coming on to me when he greeted us yesterday." Mumbled Edmund trying to chisel his initials into the side of the coffee table.

"Edmund you think every ones coming on to you." sighed Susan in an annoyed fashion.

Lucy came running into the room. "You guys there's a whole new world upstairs. Com see."

"Sure, we haven't got anything better to do." Sighed Peter getting up tiredly.

"Lucy when you said 'a whole new world' you didn't just mean an oak wardrobe with the words 'enter at own risk' did you?" Questioned Peter bemused.

Lucy rolled her eyes and opened the wardrobe door and motioned for them to enter.

"I'm claustrophobic." Susan whispered fearfully.

"Oh, you wont be claustrophobic for long trust me."

Edmund shrugged and walk inside the wardrobe followed by Peter then Susan. Lucy motioned to get in but instead closed the wardrobe doors. "Teach them to leave behind." Muttered Lucy maliciously.

"Oh, Lucy was that you?" Came a muffled voice from outside the room.

"Gees, the Professor." Lucy climbed into the wardrobe after her siblings.

**Inside the wardrobe:**

"Oh it's so dark."

"It's so small."

"Ouch Peter that was my foot."

"Sorry Susan."

"Oh God what's that smell?"

"Sorry I get gassy when I'm closed spaces."

"Lucy this new world better not be to far off or I'm going to die from toxic gas poisoning."

"Shh… the professor will here us."

"Ok there's no wa-all. Ouch my butt." Exclaimed Edmund blinded by the sudden bright light.

"Wa-oh. Oh I tripped oh well at least I landed on something soft." Said Peter happily.

"Yeah me."

"Oh sorry."

"Just get off me Ok."

"Hey. There actually is another world in the wardrobe." Cried Lucy with surprise just appearing out of the wardrobe with Susan.

"You mean you tricked us?" Screamed Susan angrily. "I braved inclosed spaces because of your trick."

"OK every one is missing the big point here." Edmund cut in looking out at the icy wonder land in front of them. "We can seriously cash in here. All we have to do is claim this land Taranulious just like they did in America and Australia and budda boom budda bang we have our own theme park."

"Hey that's a great idea but it's to cold to do anything." Replied Susan completely forgetting Lucy's trick.

"Look let's just take these coats and do some domination." Suggested Peter taking some coats out of the wardrobe and handing them to each of his siblings.

Edmund didn't except his. "That's a girl's coat."

"I know, I've had my doubts for a while now."


	2. Chapter 2

"If you were gay, do-da dodo."

"Edmund!" Groaned Peter trying not to fall down a glacier in the snow.

"That'd be okay, do-da-dodo."

"Please Edmund your going to scare away any possible slaves." Pleaded Susan turning around to face Edmund.

"Cause I like you any way and if it was me I would feel free to say that I was gay. But I'm not gay."

"Edmund you're giving me a head ache." Moaned Lucy rubbing her head.

"If you were queer."

"Edmund I'm this close to reaching inside your mouth and pulling out your voice box."

"I'd still be here."

"Edmund Please!"

"Year after year, because your dear to me and I think that you would except me toooo if I told you today, that I was gay, but, I'm, not gay"

"Edmund!"

"Okay, okay I've stopped." Soothed Edmund.

There was a rustling in the bush and out jumped an over sized beaver.

"Quick catch it, we can use it for a hat." Screamed Susan. Peter Lurched forward to catch the creature but it swerved out of the way and said. "Do you mind I'm trying to hide from my wife."

"Oh Sorry, want to be our slave tour guide, I mean we're lost could you possibly lead us to your leader." Susan said unsuccessfully trying to make it look like she didn't want to enslave him.

"Sure, anything to get away from my wife. But first I have one question."

"What?" Asked the children in unison.

"Are you the kids from that prophecy?"

The Pevency Children looked at each, if they were they would most certainly have to the poor sap but on the other hand they could exploit the strange creatures in the land. "Umm… Sure what ever you want to believe." Replied Peter trying to sound as convincing as possible.

"Good let's go then."

So the four siblings and the beaver walked on searching for this mysterious lands leader.

"So… Who's your leader, just out of interest?" asked Lucy casually.

"Oh that'd be Aslan the Lion." Replied the beaver happily.

"Hey isn't Aslan Turkish for lion?" Said Susan trying to sound smart.

"Ha! You guys sure have great names here." Snorted Edmund Cruelly.

"Hey! You guys shut up for a minute." Commanded Peter he was looking at a melting icicle, "Is that meant to happen in the middle of winter?"

"Probably not." Answered Edmund coming up beside Peter.

"Maybe all that hype about global warmings true?" Supposed Susan examining the icicle.

"No a melting icicle means only one thing." Interrupted the Beaver knowingly. "SPRING BREAK!!!!!!!!! Pa-ar-te down."

Music sounded and the beaver started dancing in a way that no one should ever have to witness. Peter and Edmund shrugged and started to dance with some dryads that had just appeared out of no where. Lucy ran around and started to build a snow fortress.

"Wait this doesn't make any sense." Screamed Susan feeling quite distressed with all the randomness.

"Who cares? I'm gonna find myself a hot dryad." Shouted Peter quite out of character with his usual polite composure.

"But what about turning this place into a theme park?"

"Oh Loosen up Su, where just kids its one idea to the next. We never finish any thing." Retorted Edmund now dancing with two dryads.

A random beach ball hit Susan on the head, she was now thoroughly peeved with how immaturely her siblings were acting.

"Right, that's it, I'm going to rule this place myself."

"All Hail Queen Susan. Get back to work you lousy slaves." Barked a rather large Ogre holding a cat of nine tails.

"Knew we shouldn't have given her the "How to take over a country in three easy steps" for Christmas." Moaned Edmund haling a block of concrete the twice his size up a steep hill.

"Just be glad we didn't give her "The Anarchy guide to nuclear war fair." Replied Peter bitterly.

"Man we give the worst presents."


End file.
